Counting the Stars (rewritten)
by HotLasagna
Summary: When Corey heads to Hogwarts with her brother James and his recently hidden best friend, Sirius, more than just secrets will tumble out into the open.
1. Prologue

**Hello! Again... I'm wiping the dust and cobwebs off this story and going in for a third time. Let's hope this time is the charm, no? I really hated how I wrote this last time because I knew I could do better so I'm rewriting each chapter to make it better than brand new and less cringy. Also, I'll have more time to write this because I'm not as focused on writing my non-fanfiction books since I just finished with one, and figured I'd take a break by writing fanfiction.**

 ***A foreword before you get started on this story. I've written on this site before with this same story. However, I decided to come back and rewrite it. It has a different name and I have a new account. Before, it was called "Because of You" by Cutiebugg713. I've rebranded myself. I didn't want anyone to think that I'm plagiarizing someone; I would never stoop that low. Same person, same concept, different story.***

* * *

 **Eleven years old – August 31, 1971**

I slip out of bed as the need to star-gaze grows stronger. My bare feet pad past James' room. The silence is brutally disrupted when I step on an Exploding Snap card. I hop around on one foot, holding the other one as the burn slowly fades away. I breathe in a deep breath and stand still, listening for any signs that James is awake. After a tense moment his snores start back up. I head downstairs to the backyard.

The sky is perfectly clear. Against the silhouettes of the trees, the sky looks more like a dark, navy blue with specks of glittering, white dots. I've always loved the stars; it's the one thing I can never get sick of. there's just something about them that is so enticing. Their ability to shine down on Earth from billions of miles away, their light unwavering...

If stars can keep it up from that distance, then surely James and I can keep in touch.

"Hey." Startled, I fall out of my chair, my bum landing firmly on the dewy grass. James begins to laugh, his eyes scrunching together as he holds his gut. Any other time I would've joined in, or pulled him down with me. This time, however, I burst into tears, unable to hold them in anymore. I've been trying not to show James how sad I am over us not going to the same schools, but I can't handle it anymore. I try to hide my face in the shadows of the night but my sobs escape my throat.

James stops laughing and kneels down next to me. "I'm sorry for laughing. Are you hurt?" I turn away from him more, "Corey, talk to me."

I shake my head, not trusting my voice. "Did you hurt yourself?" I shake my head as he repeats his answer.

"Are you scared?" This time I nod my head.

"About going to different schools?" His voice is bitter. He's known about us separating ways when schools begins, but I'm sure he'd understand if he knew why. But I can't tell him about that. Ever. "Look, I'm not happy about it either, but I won't be that bad. We'll definitely see each other on Christmas and Easter holiday. You're tough enough to survive that, right?" He grabs my hands, spinning me around to face him.

I wipe my face on my night shirt and smile. His hair is particularly messy, pushed up on one side from how he was sleeping. His brown eyes are wide with encouragement. I throw my arms around him, hugging him furiously. "It's not that, James," I mutter into his shoulder. I feel him wrap his arms around my back, "I'm afraid," my voice quivers when I finally admit it.

"Of what?"

I push out of the hug as a new wave of tears surge forward. "Wha- what if you forget about me? Or- or- or we grow apart? I... I," I trail off off stuttering, something that happens when I'm scared or sad or worried.

James pulls me back into a hug, stroking my hair down my back, "Shh, that's not going to happen. You may have only been in this family for two years, but I love you like you're my real sister. You _are_ my real sister. Don't ever doubt that, okay?" He holds me by my shoulders, locking eyes with me, "We're going to talk to each other as much as we can. We're going to tell each other about everything so we don't miss a thing. It's going to feel like we're both going to Hogwarts. I promise."

 **Thirteen years old – July 5, 1972**

"Corey! Wake up!"

I wince as a pillow hits me in the head. "James! What is your deal?" I grab the pillow off my face and throw it in what I believe is his direction. It hits the floor with a thump instead.

"My friend Remus is here. Don't be rude." I feel an uneven weight press down at the foot of my bed.

"Excuse me, I'm not the one who is throwing pillow at their sister." I complain but pull my blanket off me. I'm met with James towering above me, trying to gain balance as he stands on my bed.

James jumps down looking a little disappointed. "You never let me bounce on your bed anymore."

"James, no. That's because you broke it the last two times, you fatty." I roll out of bed, flipping my long, knotted blond hair behind my shoulders.

"Excuse _me_ , I am no fatty. I am light as a feather, with perfect aerodynamic shoulders. I have to be to be a Chaser." James wiggles his fingers in my face before reaching down for my wrist.

He drags me down to the kitchen, refusing to let me get dressed or brush my hair. Mum and Dad are sitting at the table, but there's an extra body. A skinny boy sits at the table, picking at his breakfast. His light brown, flecked with leftover soot, falls into his eyes. If he's not careful, Mum will want to give it a trim. His clothes are shabby and falling off his thin frame. He looks up as James and I barrel into the room, and I have to hold back a gasp. Running across his face is a shiny, pink scar, too new to not notice.

I quickly look away. Having scars of my own, I know how it feels when people stare. Gathering my wits, I walk up to him and smile, "Hi, you must be Remus."

He stands up, extending his hand to me, "And I'm guessing you're Corey. James has told me all about you. Never shuts up, really."

"Tell me about it. All I've heard these past few days is Remus this and Remus that. Feels like I know you on a personal level. I finally nice to meet you." I gesture for him to sit back down and move to my own chair. Beaming, James joins us at the table sitting beside Remus. James grabs half the stack of pancakes, shoving a whole one into his mouth. I stare in disgust as Mum giggles like she always does when James acts like a wild animal.

After breakfast, us kids head outside. It's a nice day with no clouds in sight. The night sky is going to be wonderful. As the boys head out into the yard, I sit down in a chair. Now out in the morning sun, I can see more scars all over Remus. I haven't seen anyone with scars like that since before I became a Potter. I freeze. It couldn't be! I study Remus' face; he seems so innocent, too young to live a curse like that. Yet, as I continue to stare at him, I see how tired he is despite the wide smile on his face.

Old memories push their way to the front of my mind. I stand up and stagger toward the house, only stopping when James calls after me. "Where you going, Core?"

I plaster a smile on my face before turning to face him, "Just, the uh, bathroom!"

James starts to say something, but I turn and run back into the house. Mum and Dad are nowhere to be seen, which I'm grateful for. I rush up to my room and close the door. I stay there for the rest of the day, claiming that girl things have happened to ward off James. It works, but then Mum starts knocking on my door every hour. Each time I pretend to be sleeping.

However, avoiding Remus for the duration of his stay here is just plain rude. I try my best to act normal around him, but every time I let my guard down, bad memories would pop up and ruin the mood. I'm sure James has caught on to my mood, but he's nice enough to not say anything. On the night of the new moon, I creep out to the backyard. I'm surprised to see Remus out here, staring up at the moonless sky.

I move to sit beside him wordlessly. He startles a bit at my presence. I clasp my hands together as I try to think up something to say. My eyes trail from the grass, to Remus, then to the sky. "The stars always seem brighter at the new moon." I glance at the boy beside me as I speak. Remus stiffens.

"I should go back to bed." He moves to stand up but I catch his wrist.

"Remus,"

"Really Corey, I"m tired." He wrenches his wrist out of my hand and heads for the doors.

"I know you're a werewolf." I don't know what makes me blurt this. I've been turning the words over and over in my head, trying to find the truth in them, trying to believe it. Remus is still as he finds an interest in his feet.

"Is that why you've been avoiding me?"

I gasp, "I would never!" Although, it's part of the truth.

"Did James tell you?"

I shake my head, urging him to sit back down, "I kind of figured it out your first day here."

"Wow, it took your brother two years to figure it out."

I laugh, "Well, he's not the most observant, is he?"

Remus joins in while shaking his head, but then the smile drops off his face. "Ha- have you met one before? Is that how you knew?"

I nod my head, tracing a long scar on my leg, "Yeah, Greyback. He never bit me, wasn't allowed. But he did make sure to leave a mark."

Remus scoffs bitterly, "Wish I was that lucky."

I knock my shoulder into his, "If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm a great listener."

"Same goes for you."

 **Fourteen-Fifteen years old – December 24, 1974**

My eyes flicker back and forth as I watch an obviously distressed James pace the length of the room. He's narrowly avoided walking right into the Christmas tree about a dozen times as he's too busy trying to pull his hair out. He's been like this ever since he got home from Hogwarts, all skittish like an abused dog. Every few minutes he's either inspecting the fireplace or sticking his head out the window.

As he passes by me for the millionth time, I grab his arm. I yank him down toward the couch, making a sacrifice as his heavy body falls on mine. He struggles to get up, but I hold him fast. "James, what is your problem?" I run my fingers through his hair trying to calm him.

"Nothing, I'm just, uh, excited."

"Then why are you trying to make yourself bald? You keep acting like you're waiting for someone."

James breaks free of my arms, something he was always capable of, and turns to me. "Corey, I'm fine. I, uh **—** " He break off as a sharp tap comes from the window. Our heads snap over to the noise to see a large, gray barn owl. James tears off my lap, opens the window, nearly ripping the poor bird's leg off to get the letter from it. With an indignant flap of its wings toward James, the owl flies off but James is too busy reading the letter.

"Who's it from? Remus? Peter?" I get up off the couch, but when I get close, James quickly crushes the parchment into a ball, hiding it behind his back. He stares down at me with a too-wide smile.

"Nobody! It's from nobody. Don't worry about it Core." James breathes in, as if the weight of the world has been lifted off his shoulders. "I'm going to go see if I can sneak cookies away from Mum. You want to come?"

I shake my head, and as he heads for the kitchen, I fall onto the couch hurt. I know he's lying to me. Why would he want to keep a secret from me? Well, there's many reasons, I tell myself. It could've been about a surprise for me. Or a present. Or maybe it was a girl from Hogwarts and he's too embarrassed to say that he's got a girlfriend. I push all the excuses away, knowing that's all they are: excuses.

Something was obviously bothering James before he got that letter. He's hiding something from me, and I don't think it's a girlfriend. We've promised to tell each other everything. So what's made him break that promise? Before the hard ball of disappointment can settle in my stomach, James rushes out of the kitchen, hands full of cookies. "I did it, Core! Come eat the evidence with me."

A laugh bubbles up in my throat, shoving the disappointment away, and I run up the stairs behind him.

 **Fifteen years old – June 6, 1975**

I drop my bag on the living room floor as James glares at me. I throw my arms out, smacking my legs as they come back down. "Aren't you excited to see me?"

Instead of running into my arms like I expected, James flares his nostrils and stomps off, leaving me alone with Remus and Peter. I click my tongue and move to sit beside the two boys. I have to admit, James' reaction did hurt a little bit. We haven't seen each other since Christmas because he hadn't come for Easter, and our letters to each other got fewer every week.

I wanted to come home right as school let out, but James told me he was having the guys over, so I decided to spend the week at a friend's house to let them have their time to relax. However, I guess James found out that friend was a boy.

"If it's any consolation, I missed you, Corey." Peter says giving me a sweet smile. I return it, throwing an arm around him for a hug.

"I missed you too, Peter. And of course, you too Remus."

The lanky boy raises his eyebrows, "You should go talk to him."

I groan because Remus is right, but James has no right to be angry with me. Francis is just a friend; we didn't even sleep in the same room together! "No," I say defiantly and loudly, hoping James can hear me. "He's the one being irrational. If he wants to talk—"

James storms back into the room, and I press myself into the couch at the anger seeping out of him. " _I'm_ being irrational? You're the one who had a sleepover with a guy. Who knows what would've happened? You don't know what goes through the male brain, Corey. It's sick—"

With tears clouding my vision, I push past him and run up to my room making sure to slam the door extra hard. James has no idea what he's talking about. I would never go off with some random guy and sleep over at his house. Not unless I was one hundred percent comfortable with him. And I am with Francis.

James is just too quick to judge any guy who gets close to me. This is why I specifically asked Mum and Dad not to tell him. I flinch as I remember James yelling. I've never seen him so mad, and despite knowing he'd never hurt me it's still terrifying. "He'd never hurt me," I say but it doesn't sound as confident as I would like it to be. A sob slips out of my lips and I curl into a ball of misery.

Sure, James and I have fought before, but never to this extinct. It's always over petty things like who gets the last pancake or who was the fastest to get down the stairs. But never has he screamed at me like that. I hear a knock on my door and I muffle my crying. "Go away,"

The door opens and James is standing there. "Corey, I'm so sorry." I don't say anything. I grab my blanket and pull it over my head, as if it'll make James go away. He sits down on my bed. "Please look at me," I shake my head but I doubt he can tell. When his hand rests gently on my head, I flinch backward. I hear James breathe in deep. A second later his weight is lifted off my bed and I hear my door shut.

I close my eyes, feeling horrible by how I reacted at his touch. _But it's not your fault,_ I tell myself. It's just a jerk reaction.

I fall asleep and wake up hours later. My legs move by themselves, taking me outside but it's useless. The sky is cloudy, dark gray lumps moving across the sky. Seems appropriate for my mood. Before I can return to bed, a body sits down beside me. I don't have to look to know it's James.

"I'm sorry." I turn to him. He's still in his clothes from earlier, hair a mess, and he's not even wearing his glasses.

"I'm sorry, too."

James shakes his head, "Don't be. I'm the jerk. I was insensitive for yelling at you earlier; it was not the right thing to do, no matter how angry I was. And I understand if you can't forgive me, but after what you've been through... I don't want you to get hurt or go through any of that again. But I guess—" I throw my arms around him.

"I love you," I tell him.

James wastes no time in hugging me back, "I love you too, Corey, no matter what I say. Now, tell me why I should like this friend of yours?"

I pull out of the hug, cracking a smile. "His name is Francis and he's nice."

James scowls, "How nice can he be if he's dating my baby sister?"

I can't help the blush that crawls over my face. "We're not dating! And I'm three months older than you."

"Plus, his name is kind of lame."

I laugh and push him, "James!"


	2. One

**I should add that this book deals with abuse. It'll be sparse, but it will be mentioned in some chapters.**

* * *

 **December 19, 1975**

"I said no. Don't make me say it again." I turn away from the persistent boy, frustrated and furious.

I try to lose him in the crowded hall, but he somehow manages to keep up. "But we both know you don't mean it." His hand finds my shoulder and I stop dead in my tracks. This only permits him to bend down to my ear, "Do you know how many times we could have?"

"Francis," I say, my voice tight, "get your hand off me. Now."

He doesn't. "Oh come on, Core."

"How many times," I raise my voice so our fellow classmates can hear, "do I have to reject you? Hasn't it gotten old, Francis?" Laughter erupts around us and I suppress a smug grin.

Francis glares at me but says nothing as I walk off to meet up with Val, my best friend, in the library. Not that we're studying because it's the second to last day of term before Christmas holiday, but we've found out that it's a great place to hide away and talk privately if you get a table in the back corner.

I spot Val instantly by her curly red hair that resembles a campfire. She's hunched over the table, no doubt carving something into the wood. No matter how many times she gets in trouble for that, she's never going to stop.

I sit down on the opposite side of the table. "Francis?" she questions without looking up.

"As usual."

"You should've dropped him when I told you," she singsongs, flicking a piece of wood shaving at me.

I don't say anything. I know she's right, but I was too late to see the shift from innocent to… not-so-innocent in mine and Francis' friendship. We were fine last year and last summer, but as our fifth year at Beauxbatons started, something changed in Francis. He got more flirty, more touchy-feely. Always positive that I wanted a relationship with him.

Finally Val glances up, her face dotted with freckles, "I'm sure he'll tire of it. You're strong for not giving in. Guys are only in it for the chase, anyway."

I cross my arms, "I don't know. There was something different this time."

Val shrugs off my my suspicions, but as we head down for lunch I can't seem to shake it off. I don't see any sign of Francis or his friends all through out lunch. Val tells me they must have left for home early; they're not the only ones. But I know she's wrong.

It starts out with a smell. Not too strong but it overpowers the smell of food. The casual conversations falter before picking back up. Then Francis and his friends enter casually, despite the glares from Madame Maxime; it's frowned upon for being late. Val misses it, but Francis throws a wicked smirk my way.

Then, all hell breaks loose. What must be hundreds of beetles fly through the air. Screams erupts from students, most crawl under the tables but it's no use. Before the professors can do anything about it, an impossible amount of compost is dropped on them: the source of the smell.

Through the haze of the beetles, I see Madame Maxime wave her hand through the muck and the beetles drop dead. The compost disappears but the damage is still there. Once everyone has settles down and removed themselves from the floor, the headmistress stands up.

"Whoever did this will be greatly punished. It'll be worse if you don't come forward yourself. If I…" she trails off as a piece of parchment floats down. She snatches it out of the air with her huge hands. Even from here, I can see the vein in her forehead throb.

"Cordelia Potter. My office. Now!"

I find myself walking to the Headmistress' office. I'm too shocked to think of anything other than the heap of trouble I'm about to get in. Before I know it, I'm in her office, shrinking under her scrutinizing glare.

She refuses to let me get a word in, cutting me off before I can defend myself. "Your behavior is completely distasteful. I have never met such a student who would do such things! This is the last straw, Miss Potter, I cannot have students wreaking havoc in my school for no reason. I'm sorry to say that you are expelled."

I feel my stomach drop as well as my jaw. "But that's not fair! I didn't even do that stupid prank." Who would even want to get me into this much trouble? It's not that I have many enemies. I try to be as friendly as I can to everybody… except Francis.

Madame Maxime continues to talk as though she didn't hear my outburst. However, I don't stick around to listen to the last of it. Ignoring my manners, I jump up from my chair and burst through her office door.

Francis did this and if anyone's going to be punished, then it's going to be him. I find him in the usual abandoned classroom he hangs out in, laughing with his friends. I stare at them, gripping my wand behind my back. "You three, out." I didn't think I'd be intimidating since they're all taller than I am, but they all scurry out, wide-eyed.

Francis is leaning casually against the wall, dirty blond hair slicked back. "Why did you frame me for that?"

He shrugs, unwavering in his cool facade at my threatening voice. "You humiliated me. You got the retaliation I saw fit."

I stare at him as if he's gone crazy, "Who do you think you are? Judge, jury, and executioner? Madame Maxime is trying to expel me for something you did! All because I won't date you?!"

With three large stride, Francis is in front of me. He cocks his head to the side with an evil smirk, "What a shame."

Heat courses through me. I promised myself a long time ago that I would never let anyone walk all over me or use me to their own advantage ever again. Francis is no exception. "No, you know what's a shame? When I take a truth potion and tell everyone the truth."

The smugness drops from his face, "You wouldn't dare."

"Watch me." I turn to go, but he grabs my wrist and pulls me back. His hand knocks my face to the side so hard that tears prick my eyes. The whole thing is so unfathomable that it takes me second to realize that he slapped me.

Almost immediately, Francis is apologetic, "Oh Corey, I'm so sorry."

I back away, holding my cheek. "Stay away from me." I wince as my voice shakes, regretting the sign of weakness.

He takes a step toward me, but I step back. We keep this up until I'm back against the wall and have no other place to go. My heart thumps erratically in my chest. Francis removes my hand from my cheek so he can place a kiss to it. I flinch away from the contact, only resulting in banging my head off the wall.

"Oh Corey," he coos, cradling my head in his hand, "why must you hurt yourself around me?"

"Le- leave me alone."

"But you came looking for me. That must mean something."

Yeah, to tear you down with me, I think but don't get a chance to say as his lips are brought down on mine. My eyes widen and I try my best to push him off me, but it's no use. Thinking quick, I wiggle my hand around to my back, grabbing my wand that I keep tucked between my belt. With a quick flick of my wrist, Francis flies backwards, breaking a desk.

Conveniently, that's when the door bursts open with Madame Maxime and a few other professors. Too distressed to care about how much trouble I'm in, I run over to them, tripping over my own two feet in my haste and falling at her feet. I bang my head off something hard and pass out.

When I wake up, I have a slight headache and a red head on my stomach. Looking around, I find that I'm in the hospital wing. Val snores louder than a thunderstorm, and I'm wondering if that's the reason I woke up. She suddenly snorts and jolts awake, mumbling, "I didn't do it!"

I chuckle, "What didn't you do, Val?"

She blinks the sleep out of her eyes before looking at me. "Oh wow, you're awake!"

"How long was I out?"

Val crawls off my bed to sit in the chair, "Just a couple hours."

"What happened?"

"Don't you remember?" She grabs for my hand and squeezes it as if my memories will return.

"No, yeah. I remember it all." Although, if I lost that memory from my life, I wouldn't feel sad about it. "I mean after me knocking myself out. What happened?"

Val sits back, retracing her hand. At first I'm worried. What if Francis did even more damage to my name? Who knows what all lies he crafted while I was out? "Well, Madame Maxime was raging, she still is. At first, it was at you for running away but then she saw what Francis was doing. Then as they were bringing you here, someone came forward, saying that they saw Francis and his friends out by the greenhouses, lugging bags of compost into the castle.

"When they were questioned, I heard that Sebastian nearly burst at the seams to come clean."

I take a second to let it all sink in. "So I'm not being expelled?"

Val shrugs, "I haven't heard anything about that."

I lean my head back into my pillows and close my eyes. My relief doesn't last long though. The whole scene with Francis replays in my mind: he slaps me, backs me into the wall, kisses me. Slap, wall, kiss. Slap. Wall. Kiss. It's too much for me to handle.

I don't even realize that I'm crying until Val shoves a tissue in my hand. Then my body starts to shake as memories I buried deep resurface. I curl myself into a ball. Val starts to freak out, trying to reassure me that I'll definitely stay now since the truth's been told.

But being expelled or staying in school is not my problem, and I can't blame Val for not knowing. Despite being my closest friend, I have yet to tell her anything about my life before becoming a Potter. I know she'd be understanding, but there's always this nagging little voice in the back of my head, telling me that she'd be disgusted. So I haven't.

After what seems like hours of crying my eyes out, the school's nurse rushes out and all but shoves a calming potion down my throat. Peace washes over me, but one rushed thought escapes my lips.

"I can't go to school here anymore."


	3. Two

I step off the massive horse-drawn carriage alone. Val is angry with me. I talked with Madame Maxime about me not feeling comfortable at Beauxbatons anymore–she merely let Francis go with detention for the rest of the year and banned him from playing Quidditch for the rest of his time there.

I hate that his punishment is less than what I would've gotten, but I guess that's what happens when your parents are influential and rolling around in money.

Madame Maxime said she'd see what she could do, but if she has then I haven't heard anything back. Val caught wind of this and demanded that I tell her the reasoning of my decision. But I couldn't. It all got caught in my throat and Val stormed off, refusing to talk to me.

Shining through the crowd like a beacon of love and hope is my parents. I push through the crowd of students and parents reuniting since we left for school. There's a lot of indignant mumbling, but the only thing on my brain is hugging my parents.

I plow straight into Mum's arms. She wraps around me tightly and Dad joins in. Their warmth envelops me, washing away yesterday's horror. I suspect that they've been filled in on everything, which puts me at ease. The last thing I want is to relive what happened.

"Let's go home, sweetie," Mum says and nods at Dad. He twirls his wand at my forgotten luggage and it disappears off to home.

We walk off to a less crowded corner, I grab onto Dad's arm, and we turn on the spot disappearing just like my luggage. We land in the sitting room of our home with Mum not so far behind us. I flop back onto the sofa, reveling in the nostalgic comfort. I'm all ready to curl up on the spot and take a nap, but my parents stop me.

"Honey," Dad starts, "we need to talk about what happened."

I groan and hide my face in the cushion of the couch. "Right now?"

"No sweetie," I feel a hand rub my hair, "you go get settled. We can wait until later and talk it out when James gets home."

My eyes widen and I sit up, "No. No. No. No! James cannot know about this. He'll flip and go crazy!" James is already so protective over me. The last thing I need him doing is getting in trouble and going to Azkaban over hexxing Francis.

"Then talk to us," Dad insists.

I groan again, but this time louder and longer. "You guys are the worst."

They sit on either side of me. Mum throws her arms around me, kissing my cheek. "We love you, too. We just want to know if you're serious about not wanting to go to Beauxbatons anymore."

I nod my head without hesitation. "I can't…" I close my eyes and everything that Francis did comes rushing back. "Not with him still there."

Dad pats my head before planting a kiss on top of it, "Okay princess. Go get settled."

Up in my room, my luggage waits for me at the foot of my bed. James always says that my room is 'too Muggley,' but it's not my fault I'm not obsessed with Quidditch enough to decorate my entire room with my favorite team. My walls are bright yellow and the carpet is a more mellow yellow. My bed is covered in dark blue, matching the ceiling, except the ceiling has the night sky magically painted on it and when I turn the lights off, the stars glow.

The stars have always been a constant in my life. Whenever I feel down, all I have to do is just look at them and everything will be alright again. Nothing can compare to the calm that they give me; except for a calming draught.

My bed isn't the softest, but it's familiar. I snuggle under the blankets, breathing the scent of fresh citrus in deep. Now this is home; I can feel the stress of the past two days practically wash away. But the problem still remains.

If I'm not going back to Beauxbatons, then where will I go? I wouldn't mind if I have to go to Muggle school. It might be interesting. I've never been, but I have a Muggle-born friend at Beauxbatons and she liked it fine. Would that mean I have to lose my wand?

My racing thoughts finally give me a break and I fall asleep. I'm having a nice dream where I'm sitting on the edge of a warm beach when I'm jolted awake. My eyes shoot open as I'm bounced around my bed, and then they narrow at the culprit.

With a huge grin on his face, James continues to jump on my bed. Then there's a loud crack. James' face drops and his mouth opens. Honestly, I don't know why he's so shocked. This isn't the first time–and I don't believe it'll be the last time either–he's broken my bed like this. I just don't see why he continues to do it.

"You broke my bed!"

James gets over his shock and steps down with a shrug. "Good thing we're magic, eh?"

I roll my eyes but shoot out of my bed and into his arms. "I missed you so much."

"Of course you did. You have to be crazy not to." I can hear the smile in his voice, though, as he wraps his arms around me, squeezing until I can barely breathe anymore.

"Okay, okay! You've made your point." I try to push away from him but he holds me tight.

"Give me a minute. I haven't seen my baby sister in months."

He's shoving my face so far into his chest that I can't retaliate with my usual response, saying that I'm three months older than he is. After much punching and hair pulling, James finally lets go of me. His face is split by a huge grin, but as he studies my face it slowly drops.

"What's wrong?"

My heart sputters before picking back up again. "No- nothing's wrong. How was Hogwarts? Remus? Peter? Any girls catch your eye?"

James remains unconvinced, crossing his arms and giving me a look that says, 'tell me or I'll make you go crazy until you do.' "Corey," he says in that voice he abuses to make me open up to him. But not this time; I will hold my ground.

I shrug, "I had a fight with, uh, Val before leaving Beauxbatons."

He still looks unconvinced, but he can't resist his brotherly instincts to ask me about it. "Why? What happened?"

I sit down on my bed, "You know girls, always emotional for no reason." I curse at how unbelievable I sound.

James sits down beside me, takes my hand, and smiles a smile that scares me. Not scary as in menacing; scary because I know he's going to get the truth out of me. "Are you done? Because you suck at lying–"

"I really did have a fight with Val though," I defend.

"And that's terrible, but that's not the real reason, is it?"

He holds my gaze and the words leave my mouth before I can even think to stop them. I watch as James' face quickly sours as my story progresses. It takes longer than necessary because I stutter over every other word, but by the end of it, his fists are clenched so hard that his knuckles turn white.

I tear my eyes off his hands to look him in the face, "Please, don't be mad. It's taken care of and–"

"Taken care of?" he explodes, hopping up off my bed so he can pace around while he vents. "That little–" his words are so garbled that I can't make out what he says– "only gets detention and banned from playing Quidditch, while you were going to get expelled? That's," he struggles to find the right word, "I don't even know what that is, but it's dumb.

"I swear, when I get my hands on that sorry excuse for a–"

I jump up and grab his hands. James stops abruptly at my touch. "I don't want you to do anything to him. Retaliation will only take you down to his level. It wouldn't make you better than him. Just drop it, okay? Everything is fine now."

Steam practically comes out of his ears, "Fine? Corey, nothing is fine! Because of that creep, you don't want to go to school anymore. How is that fine?"

"I said Madame Maxime is working on it."

He looks at me desperately, "But what if you have to go to Muggle school?"

I shrug, "Then I go to Muggle school. And you can teach me magic on the down-low. There'd be no better teacher."

Our conversation is cut short by a series of sharp taps on my window. A large owl is glaring at us through the glass with a letter tied to its leg. I rush over to open my window, and the owl flies over to my bedside table. I quickly untie the letter, and with an indignant flap of its wings, the owl flies off into the night.

The letter is addressed from Beauxbatons. My heart pounds in my chest and my blood rushes loud in my ears. My hands are shaky as I open it, and they get even more shaky as I read the letter. It's fairly short, but I reread it so many times it might as well have been ten pages long.

"What? What is it?" James steps up behind me to read it over my shoulder.

"I-it's from Madame Maxime. It says she made a deal with Headmaster Dumbledore, allowing me to go to Hogwarts." I wonder how she pulled that off? And what kind of deal did she make?

A rainbow of emotions sprouts out of me. I'll finally be able to go to Hogwarts! With James! I go to turn to him, expecting to receive the same emotions, but instead of happiness and excitement, James is stood still and white as a ghost.

"James?"

Dinner is unusually quiet. We always have something to talk about, especially when we come home from school. I gave Mum and Dad my letter; they were both thrilled and worried. Then they found a letter from Dumbledore that I missed in my enthusiasm, detailing that it'd be ideal to get me Sorted before school starts up again, asking when would be the best time to set that up.

After the unsatisfying dinner, I excuse myself with the lie that I'm tired. But actually, my head is swimming with reasons why James wouldn't want me to go to Hogwarts. It keeps me up all night thinking about it.

Maybe it's not such a good idea after all. I didn't go to Beauxbatons for no reason. Mum and Dad decided a long time ago that going to Hogwarts would be too risky, the obvious choice of school to go to. My old family went there. If they were ever interested in finding me again, then they'd look there.

But I'm not that scared and defenseless little girl anymore. Okay, maybe I'm a bit scared, but definitely not defenseless. I am, or was, at the top of my classes at Beauxbatons. My teachers all told me that I'm advanced for my age and highly skilled.

Then I hear a loud thud and a grunt downstairs.

I bolt upright in my bed. My heart jackhammers against my chest, missing a beat or two. My skin tingles with fear. The rational side of me is saying it's just a lost witch or wizard who got our at the wrong grate.

The terror-ridden side of me is running through a list of who it could be. A burglar. A murderer. Both a burglar and a murderer. Francis seeking revenge again. Or… them.

Despite every bone in my body screaming at me to wake up Dad and let him investigate, I grab a discarded quaffle from the corner of my room that I never cleaned up from our last game of the summer, and peek out of my room. It's not the perfect weapon, but it's all I have.

The house is dark, adding to the creepy factor. I grip the quaffle hard in my hands as I venture out of my room. I'm careful where I step while going downstairs, making sure to step around the creaky spots. By the time I'm in the sitting room, my breathing is shallow and my heart rate is off the charts.

Straining my eyes in the dark, I can just make out a silhouette. Whoever they are, they're tall. They move towards me, and I clutch the quaffle closer to me. Then the intruder trips over something in the dark and starts to fall towards me.

The quaffle gets knocked out of my hands as I fall to the ground, screaming all the way, with the intruder on top of me. I faintly hear them trying to shush me, even going as far to cover my mouth, but that only freaks me out more.

"Fine, I'll get off. Just shut up!" They roll off me, and I jump up just as the lights turn on. James and Dad run down the stairs toward us.

I ram into Dad. His hands wrap around me, turning me around so he's between me and the intruder. Beside us, James wields a Beater's bat above his head. He's about to attack whoever it is but something stops him.

"Sirius?"


	4. Three

"Sirius?"

Sirius? Who is Sirius?

I peer around Dad's back. The intruder is still lying on the ground, but my quaffle attack didn't knock him out. He looks to be around mine and James' age with black hair that's splayed around his head. A red mark covers his forehead. I jump back as he raises his hand, "Hey James."

James drops the bat and rushes toward Sirius to help him up. Dad follows, leaving me out in the open. I stare open-mouthed as the three of them reunite like old friends. Behind me, I hear light footsteps. Mum stands at the top of the staircase, clutching her robe to her chest.

"Sirius?"

Their heads snap up to her. Sirius smiles and waves, "Hey Mrs. P. Sorry for dropping by so late."

"Oh it's fine, darling," Mum makes her way down the stairs, ignoring me completely as she walks toward Sirius. "You know you're allowed here anytime."

I'm so confused my head starts spinning. "Excuse me," I call out, earning their attention, "would someone like to clue me in on what's happening? And who the hell is this?"

My eyes glance over each person, landing on Sirius. He's staring at me with the same amount of confusion that I feel. "I have the same question. Prongs?" He looks to James. A quiet gasp leaves my lips. I've heard Remus and Peter call James that a few times before.

I look at James. He's stock-still, eyes glazed over as he stares into the distance. "James," my voice is quiet but it snaps him out of it. His eyes are full of guilt. He never thought he'd get caught.

Dad moves next to him, patting his shoulder, "It was going to come out sooner or later."

James looks at Mum, a desperate look in his eyes. All she does is shake her head, "Introduce them, honey."

Heaving a sigh like he was tasked with the hardest job of his life, James steps toward me, stopping halfway between me and Sirius. "Corey, this is Sirius: my best friend. Sirius, this is Corey: my sister."

"You have a sister?" Sirius' voice is nothing but incredulous. I look to him again, but his eyes are already on me, studying me trying to find any resemblance to the Potters but he's not going to find any.

Dad and James both have wild, black hair. Their jaws are square and have hazel eyes. Mum has shoulder-length brown hair that's part wavy and straight. Her face is softer and more round than the guys. Her eyes are a mix between blue and green. Not to mention all three of them are tanner than I am.

My skin is pale, but my cheek and nose are always a slight red. My hair is a white-blond and down to my waist; I've always been too self conscious to cut it due to scars. My eyes are an electric blue. Sometimes, I want to blame my biological parents for my appearance, but then I realize that they have the same features as me. And I have other things to blame them for.

"She doesn't look like you." Sirius points out.

Everyone hesitates, but it's James who answers, "She's uh, adopted but she's the best sister anyone could ever have, and I love her very much. And she shouldn't be mad at me for a stupid mistake."

"Nice try," I tell him, before running off back up to my room. Exhaustion washes over me, allowing me to escape my problems for a few hours.

The days leading up to Christmas are lonely and tense. My anger towards James sticks around, and I refuse to talk to him despite a lot of coercing from Mum and Dad. It's not like he needs me anyway; James seems to be having enough fun with just Sirius. They even Floo to Diagon Alley on Christmas Eve, and when they come back, they're both secretive.

I feel like my anger toward James is justified. He's always trying to get me to talk about things that I don't want to talk about. He knows exactly what to do to break me and get me to spill my guts. Yet here he is, hiding a best friend from me for who knows how long. It's bad enough that our parents knew about Sirius too.

This whole thing has made me question my part in this family. I feel hurt and embarrassed. All I can think about is that James feels ashamed of me. It hurts, a lot. And as I sit on the sidelines, watching James and Sirius have fun together, I can't help but feel like I'm being replaced.

Why hasn't he came to talk to me yet? He's always the first person to follow me after I run off angry or sad. Even if I didn't want to talk. What's so different now?

When Christmas morning comes around, I stay in bed late. Usually, I'm the first one up, running around the house to wake up the others. But right now, it's hard to find joy even on this happiness-infected day.

Outside my room, I hear James and Sirius exit James' room. Their voices are muffled, but I can still make out what they're saying. "Are you going to wake her?" Sirius asks.

James doesn't even hesitate on his answer, "No, she'll find her way."

I roll over onto my side, away from the door as tears fill my eyes.

I don't know how long I stay in bed for, but it's long enough for Mum to come check on me. She sits on the edge of my bed and strokes my hair. "What's wrong, sweetie? We're all waiting for you."

I shrug, "To quote James, I'll find my way." My voice is bitter and quavers when I talk.

"Sweetie, James feels bad enough. Why don't you two just talk? This has gone on long enough."

I twist my upper half so I can face her. "I didn't do anything wrong. If he truly was sorry for what he did, then he should've come to me ages ago, but he's too busy running around with Sirius."

Mum sighs, "Maybe he's just waiting for the right time?"

"Then we clearly have different opinions on when the right time is."

"Just come down, okay? It's Christmas," Mum leans down and pecks my cheek.

I huff a sigh and try to suppress a smile, "Fine, but I'm only doing it for you… And Dad."

Mum leaves shortly after. I stay in bed for a second longer before rolling out and moving to my closet. We have a tradition where we stay in our pajamas all day on Christmas. Of course, there are days that aren't Christmas when I stay in my pajamas, but for Christmas we have special pajamas.

Mine consists of dark blue pants with white polar bears and igloos printed on them, along with a fuzzy, white sweater. After brushing out my hair, which is always a difficult task, I grab the wrapped packages that I stuffed in the back of my closet.

Downstairs, everyone is gathered around the Christmas tree. We all put it up the other day, but I hardly helped. James and Sirius were too busy fighting with the ornaments to let me grab even one so I just gave up.

Speaking of who, the two boys are sat in the floor around a large box with holes. The ball of anger in my stomach softens when I see James in his set of red, reindeer-covered pajamas. He glances up, our eyes connecting instantly. I look away as I sit on the sofa between Mum and Dad.

"These are for you two," I hand my parents their respective packages, "and this is for you." I lean forward to hand James a rectangular and thin gift, then look to Sirius. "If I knew you existed then I'd have something for you, but unfortunately I was never told about you."

I'm surprised by how harsh I sound because I decided to put away my feelings for today. I guess I'm not doing a very good job of it though.

"Corey," Dad says in a low, warning voice.

I back off and sit back into the sofa. "That's fine," Sirius says, shooting me lazy grin, "I didn't get you anything for the same reason."

"Not true! You helped me pick this out for her." James jumps in.

"That doesn't make it my gift."

"Yes it does." James protests as he picks up the box and carefully hands it to me, "Here Corey; it's from me and Sirius."

I resist the urge to shake it. It's heavier than I expected and the weight is unstable, moving back and forth impatiently in the box. "There's something alive in there," I state.

James can't sit still, he's so excited. "Open it!"

I glance down at the box wearily, "I swear, if this is a prank…" I trail off when a soft meow comes from the box. "You didn't."

"Open! It!" I waste no time ripping the box open. Sitting in the middle of the box, staring up at me is a cat. James shuffles over on his knees. "His name is Dip. He's a ragdoll cat and loves being loved. I knew you always wanted a cat, so I got you one."

I throw away the box and grab the cat from James' arms. Dip is mostly white, except for the black tip of his tail, like someone dipped it in an inkwell. Now the name Dip makes sense. "Thank you, James. And Sirius."

.

James knew exactly what he was doing when he bought me Dip. As the days pass, I find it gets harder and harder to stay mad at him. How can I when I have a cute and cuddly cat that falls asleep on my chest? However, I'm still holding out for an apology.

My stomach wakes me up in the middle of the night and I trek down to the kitchen in search of leftovers. Dip joins me and I give him a piece of turkey, something I've gotten into trouble for multiple times already, but I just can't help it.

"He's going to get fat if you keep feeding him like that."

I don't look up from my plate as Sirius sits beside me. I'm still confused on how I feel toward Sirius. He's not like Remus or Peter, where I just warm right up to them instantly. Maybe it's because he was hidden from me. Or maybe it's something else that I haven't been able to identify.

"So I hear you're coming to Hogwarts with us?"

I turn to face him. "Yeah, I was excited. James wasn't; now I know why."

Sirius' mouth opens but nothing comes out. He looks away, "You should talk to him. He's pretty banged up about this whole thing."

Rolling my eyes, I stand up and take my empty plate to the sink. "I keep getting told that, yet it seems impossible for James to come to me." I head for the door, done talking with Sirius. I expect Dip to follow me because that's all he's done since I got him, but as I turn to call for him, he's sitting on Sirius' lap, purring away.

Sirius grins at me. With a huff I stomp off.

In the morning, I wake up to James pounding on my door. At first, I think he's back to normal and is here to apologize and talk it out, but then he says, "Dumbledore is here! Wake up!"

My heavy eyes shoot open and all the sleepless hours I've had disappear. With all the drama revolving around James and Sirius, I haven't had time to worry about Professor Dumbledore coming here to Sort me.

I come from an evil background. What if the Hat takes that into count? I know all about the evil that comes out of Slytherin. I saw that from my parents. The Hat will see everything that was done to me, everything I saw. My stomach rumbles, disgruntled.

I fly out of bed and to my closet. Who knows how long James was trying to wake me up. I pull on clothes, taking only seconds to make sure that everything matches. Then I rush to the bathroom to brush my hair and teeth.

I'm just about finished when I hear Mum call for me. "Coming!"

Everyone is waiting around the sitting room. James and Sirius are sitting quietly on the sofa, which is strange because they're always making some kind of noise. Mum and Dad are standing behind the sofa, tapping their fingers anxiously. Then my eyes land on the reason why. Standing in the middle of the room, draped in dark blue robes is Dumbledore. His hair is white and long, mixing in with an even longer beard.

"So- sorry to keep every- everyone waiting." At the sound of my voice, everyone startles besides Dumbledore.

"It's quite alright, Miss Potter. You're here now, that's all that matters." Even though is voice is forgiving, I still feel ashamed. Putting my head down, I walk down the remaining stairs and over to Dumbledore.

"Shall we get started?"

"Yes, please," Dad breathes like he was holding his breath all this time.

A stool magically appears in the center of the room and I slowly sit down on it. I stare at the four people in front of me, wishing I sat the other way. Dumbledore steps into my view of them, holding an old and dirty wizard's hat. "This is the Sorting Hat. All I have to do is place it on your head."

I nod, "Let's do this." I sound much more confident than I actually feel as the hat is placed on my head. Dumbledore steps to the side. I wish he hadn't. All their eyes on me makes me even more nervous so I shut my eyes.

Very interesting.

I jump at the sound of the voice in my ear. "What?"

"What? What did it say?" I hear James ask.

"Shut up Prongs," Sirius tells him, then I hear a smack.

You're determined not to turn into your past. You're loyal, but not afraid to stand up for what's right. Strong and fierce.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

The last word is yelled out loud by the hat. There's a lot of clapping, but before I can even get up off the stool, James barrels into me. We fall backward off the stool and onto the floor. The air rushes out of my lungs.

"James!" I wheeze.

"Sorry! Sorry!" He rolls off me, but we stay in the floor. "Sorry," he says again, but this time more sincere, and I know it's not about nearly killing me.

"I know. It's all right."

His hazel eyes are full of concern. "It's not. I just want you to know that I never meant to hurt you. I love you; you're my sister. And of course, I'm ecstatic that you're finally coming to Hogwarts with me!"

"James?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we talk about this when we're not lying on the floor?" We both raise our heads, glancing around the room. Everyone is staring at us, but when they see us looking, their heads shoot the other direction. Discreet.

Dumbledore smiles down at us. "I'll see you when term starts, Miss Potter. I'm glad to have you at my school."


	5. Four

It's finally the day we go to Diagon Alley to get my things for Hogwarts! I'm just pulling on my shoes when James bursts through my door. "Uh, come in?"

"You like Sirius, right?" His words take me back as I was not expecting that.

"What? Of course I do!" Not.

Okay, it's not so much of a dislike I have for Sirius, because I'm trying to like him. It's just hard for me to cozy up to him like I did with Remus and Peter. I would love to like him because obviously he means a lot to James. But his voice, ugh, it just grates down on my nerves. And whenever he makes a joke, I'm the only one not laughing.

But, I really am trying to like him.

James places his hands on his hips, unbelieving. "Really?"

I hold his gaze for as long as I can before breaking down. "It's not that I don't like him, okay? I'm just having a hard time with trusting at the moment."

Now it's his turn to look ashamed. "I said I was sorry for keeping him a secret, Core."

I purse my lips and give him a dry look, "That's not what I meant. After what happened with Francis… I trusted him too much. He was one of my best friends, but look what he did to me. You know I already have major trust issues."

I watch as he deflates then his face goes all red. "I totally forgot about that prick."

I shrug and stand up, finished with my shoes, "That makes one of us. So what brought this all on?"

James sighs and runs a hand through his hair, "Sirius believes that you don't like him. Can you please go tell him that he's wrong, and that he needs to get his ass dressed so we can all go to Diagon Alley!"

"Shut up, Prongs!" Sirius's voice is muffled when he yells from the room across the hall. James pleads silently with his eyes. Sighing inwardly, I brush past him and walk into his room.

Sirius is laying on the edge of James' bed with his arms crossed and eyes closed. "Hey," I say, not sure how to start this conversation.

His eyes shoot open. "Oh, hey. What's up."

I move to sit on the foot of the bed but think better of it. "Uh, look it's not that I don't like you. I just have, uh, issues."

Sirius pulls himself up into a sitting position and smiles sadly at me, "Don't we all."

I shake my head, "I just have trust issues. So when I say it's not you, it's me, I really mean it. Don't take what I do or don't do to heart, okay? If James likes you then you can't be all that bad. So get dressed because you're coming to Diagon Alley with us."

A real smile fights its way onto his face, "Well, if you insist."

After Sirius gets ready, we all stand in front of the fireplace each with a handful of Floo powder. James insists on going first, no other reason than that he's excited for me to get my things for Hogwarts. Sirius goes next and then me.

I've never been a fan of flying over dirty fireplace bricks. No matter what I do, I always bump my elbow or my head. Trust me, I don't need anymore bumps to my head. And I'm not the most graceful lander either. I'm always tripping out of fireplaces or landing hard on my butt.

So, when I end up stumbling out of the fireplace in the Leaky Cauldron, I'm not surprised. However, I am astonished when a pair of arms grab me before I can tumble down onto the ground. I look up into a pair of gray eyes beaming down at me.

"Well, well, well, look who's already falling for me." Sirius holds me in his arms as I collect my bearings. "Any day now, love."

Scowling, I push him away from me. "Thanks, but don't touch me." I walk away from him, wiping the feel of his hands off my arms.

The Leaky Cauldron is mostly empty. No one in their right mind would leave their warm house for the absolute blizzard we're having right now. However, there is one person who will brave the frigid temperatures. And he's at the table closest to the blazing fire.

"Remus!" I take the chair beside him. The relief I feel when I see Remus is unexplainable. I guess after the week—the longest week of my life—I've had, a little bit of familiarity is the best feeling. "How was your Christmas? Did you like what I gave you?"

Remus takes a sip of his hot chocolate, "Mine was great. And yes, I loved it very much." His green eyes follow Sirius and James as they join us at the table. "And I'm guessing yours was much more eventful than mine."

"Can you believe," I explode, "that he kept a secret from me? James! The boy who refuses to let me keep even one little thing to myself. Mr. You better tell me what's on your mind because I can see that something is wrong with my special eyes."

"Special eyes?" James mutters under his breath.

My head snaps toward him, "Oh, don't act like you don't know that your eyes can't pull the deepest and darkest secret from the most—"

"Okay, we get it," James interrupts, annoyed with my words, "I have special eyes."

"Honestly though Prongs, did you really think you could keep them away from each other forever?" Remus shakes his head, as if he's had this conversation before and is tired of it.

"You know, I wasn't really thinking of future consequences."

"Seems to me you don't think at all," Sirius joins in, and this time he makes me laugh. James glares at Sirius, and before James can hit him, Mum and Dad arrive.

"Hello Remus, dear."

"Nice to see you again, Mrs. Potter."

"Shall we split up and get the items that way?" Everyone nods their heads.

"I call dibs on getting my robes," I announce, hauling Remus up as I stand, "And I want Remmy to come with me."

James pouts, "Why not me?"

I grab Remus' arm and hug it to me, "Because he's my favorite."

"Yeah James I'm her favorite," he says to James, and in a quieter tone he says, "although, please never call me Remmy again."

We walk off, Remus chuckles, "You know, he probably thinks we're dating." I toss my head back and laugh.

Even though Madam Malkin's shop isn't that far away from the Leaky Cauldron, by the time Remus and I get there we're shaking in our boots. A squat witch emerges from the back of the store, her arms laden with a rainbow of robes so high I'm surprised she hasn't tripped yet.

"I'll be right with you," she says before leaving the way she came.

Remus and I sit down by the window. The snow is really coming down hard. There's only a handful of wizards and witches out there, heads down against the heavy winter weather. Beside me, Remus pulls out a book from nowhere and starts reading.

I hate to interrupt him, I really do but he's the only one who can answer my questions. "Hey, do you know why James never told me about Sirius? Because James never really explained it to me."

At first, I think he doesn't hear me because his eyes never move away from the book's page. Then, as I'm about to ask it again, he folds his book up and looks to me. "From what James told me, I guess he was afraid."

"Afraid of what?" Afraid that I'll like Sirius better than him? Afraid that Sirius and I would hate each other, and he'd have to choose sides in our fights? It doesn't make any sense.

Remus is quiet again, thinking. "Well, Sirius is a Black. They're into Dark Arts, like your parents were. He's afraid that the Blacks would find out about who you really are, and then your parents would take you away."

"Sorry for the wait." Madam Malkin's sudden voice makes me jump, nearly falling out of my chair. "What will it be today? Here for new robes, Mr. Lupin?" The squat woman asks, holding a tape measure.

"Uh, it's for me," I stand up, blocking Remus, "I need robes for Hogwarts."

Madame Malkin eyes me up and down, waiting for me to burst out saying that this is a prank. "A bit old, aren't you?" she says, but ushers me off to get fitted.

While she measures me, going on and on about this weather, I think about what Remus told me. James was scared about the Blacks finding out? Are Sirius' parents really that horrible? My biological parents never mentioned any Blacks, but they never really talked to me when they let me out of the prison they called my room so it's entirely possible that they knew the Blacks.

This new information sheds some light onto things. All the lingering anger I had towards James completely vanishes. After all, he was just a little boy who was trying to protect his sister. And it's not like I'm not hiding things from him also. Guilt washes over me as I think about this.

They are two completely different things, I tell myself. And, of course, I'm right. Keeping what happened to me in the past from James is not the same as him keeping Sirius away from me. I'm still mulling it over in my head as Remus and I return to the Leaky Cauldron, robes packaged.

Remus and I are the last ones back. Judging by the scowl on James' face when he spots us, he does think there's something going between Remus and me. I laugh slightly but don't correct his thoughts; it'll be hilarious to see how long I can keep this going. Mugs of steaming Butterbeer sit in front of them. The warmth of the Leaky Cauldron bites into my cheeks as I thaw out. The snow that I dragged in starts to melt, dampening my hair and clothes.

"I promised my mum I'd be home before lunch. See you at Hogwarts, Corey." He hugs me, waves goodbye to everyone, and heads for the fireplace. With a whoosh of green fire, he disappears.

* * *

"Here we are!" James waves his hands in the air, accidentally knocking a Muggle in the head. James draws his hands back in with a sheepish smile, "Sorry," he mutters. He turns around and stumbles into my trolley. Dip hisses from his cat-carrier when it wobbles from the impact.

"Calm down Prongs," Sirius says as he walks up beside me. I discreetly roll my eyes as he calls James that dumb nickname he's always calling him.

"I'm sorry! It's just Corey, you're finally coming to Hogwarts. Do you know how long I've waited for this? Too long, I can tell you that."

Even though James' excitement is getting annoying real fast, I can't help but smile. I got along well at Beauxbatons, but there was always something that was missing. That something was James. There was never anything to tell James about Beauxbatons; not like the things he has had to tell.

"So tell me something," Sirius starts, "why didn't you go to Hogwarts in the first place?"

His question takes me off guard. Any questions that involve me digging into my past always have that effect on me. Fortunately, James answers for me. And unfortunately, James answers for me. "Her parents are horrible people, and she had to hide from them."

"James!" I shove my trolley at him and he's too slow to dodge the attack. He doubles over, rubbing his injured shins.

"What? Remus and Peter know. What's so different about Sirius?" I glance at the boy in question, who is politely looking away as if he's trying to phase out and away from the conversation.

However, before I can pull together an answer that doesn't involve me saying that I still don't like Sirius, Mum and Dad save me. Dad points to the entrance to Platform Nine and three-quarters. I've never been on it before, but James has told me everything about it.

From the perspective of a Muggle, it's just a plain barrier between platforms nine and ten. Yet, on days like this, if you walk right into the barrier then you'll find yourself in a whole new world.

James insists on going first so he can see my reaction, and Sirius follows. Dad and Mum take my trolley from me so I won't mess it up since it is my first time. I doubt that would happen, but after James breaking his nose on his first time through I guess they're not taking any chances.

I make sure no Muggles can see me when I slip through the barrier. A crowd of witches and wizards dressed to fight the weather stand around to say farewell to their children. Steam swirls around our ankles as it pours from a scarlet steam train announcing that it's the Hogwarts Express.

I glance behind me as my parents come through, only to see a wrought-iron archway instead of bricks. My eyes go back to the large and noisy crowd. These people are my new school mates. Well, most of them anyway. My previous enthusiasm gets swallowed by anxiety.

My eyes dart around, subconsciously searching for their familiar faces. The crowd is too dense to be productive but I can't help it. New environments always do this to me… Actually anytime I go out in public, I'm always painfully aware of how vulnerable I am.

James picks up on my change of mood instantly. Either that or he saw my anxiety leaking onto my face. He takes long strides over to me and encases my shoulders in his large hands. "Everything is going to be fine, Core. Hogwarts is the safest place on Earth! No one and nothing is ever going to lay a hand on you. Especially with me there, okay?" All I can do is nod my head. James pulls me into a hug.

"Sirius and I are going to take your things and find a compartment. You stay here with Mum and Dad since that part can be a bit hectic. I'll be back." He kisses the top of my head before taking the trolley from Dad. Then the crowd swallows him and Sirius as they near the train.

I turn to my parents. Their faces match the worry I feel churning inside me. "Sweetie, promise us that you'll go straight to Professor Dumbledore if you feel there's anything wrong." Mum tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"And promise you'll owl us soon. Tell us about what classes you like and don't like," Dad says, stroking my head.

"I will," I choke out.

"There's nothing to be worried about, princess," Dad tells me, trying for a smile of his own.

"Th- then why are you two so worried?"

Mum shakes her head, "We'll be fine, and so will you." Behind me, I hear the train's whistle. "You better go, but first here." She grabs a piece of paper from her pocket and shoves it in my hands.

"Hogsmeade? But I thought you guys didn't want me to go." We had a long heated argument about whether or not I was allowed to go to Hogsmeade. I had given up reluctantly. James told me so many wonderful things about the place; to not go was a blow to the gut, but I couldn't argue against my parents. Especially since they had good points, but I guess they changed their minds.

Again, the whistle blows. The platform is now only parents waving goodbye.

Sensing the urgency, I hug them both fiercely before running for the train. James is there to help me up. "Thought you wouldn't make it there for a moment." He squeezes my hand as if to make sure I'm really there.

"Not for the world."

.

I understand what James meant about the train being hectic. Even after the Hogwarts Express takes off, the corridor is a mess of students happy to be reconnected with their friends. They run past James and me as he leads me to the compartment he saved.

I can feel eyes burning into the back of my neck. My hand flutters up to readjust my hair just in case. It's like everyone is staring straight through my clothing and right at my scars. I want to ask James how much longer, although I only just got on the train two seconds ago, but don't want to draw even more attention to myself.

Finally, with a breath of relief, James hauls me out of sight from everyone and into the compartment where Sirius is already sitting. He shuts the blinds as well, just to be sure. A shiver runs through me and I sit down by the window.

"That felt longer than it should've."

James sends me an apologetic smile and plops down on the seat across from me, "I did say it was hectic."

I don't answer back as I let Dip out of his cat-carrier. He meows angrily, probably because I bribed him with treats to get him in there, but settles himself onto my lap. I watch the passing scenery as the boys pick up a conversation about the next Quidditch match. It's all so pretty as we get further and further away from London.

It's only when the compartment door slides open do I realize that Remus and Peter have been missing. Well, only Remus now as Peter steps in and shuts the door. "I have been looking everywhere for you two," he admonishes James and Sirius. "Why the bloody hell do you have the blinds… closed… for? Corey? What are you doing here?"

"Oh, hey Peter," I always thought there was something off about Peter. I can't explain it anymore than I can explain why I don't like Sirius. It's just a feeling I have in the pit of my stomach. An alert that goes off in my head every time I see him. That being said, Peter is so timid that I can't imagine him doing anything evil.

"Corey?" James asks, not missing a beat, "Corey isn't here, Wormtail." He talks slow, trying to reassure his friend. Confusion sweeps over me, but seeing James' mischievous smile, I realize what he's trying to do.

Peter' watery blue eyes widen as he walks closer to me, gesturing vehemently at me, "She's right here, Prongs!" Dip hisses at him and Peter flinches backward, but doesn't back down. "You see her right, Padfoot? Wait, how do you know about her?"

Sirius has no qualms about joining in, "Corey? 'Course, yeah. Met her during the holiday, but then she went straight back to Beauxbatons. Are you feeling alright, Wormy?"

Peter slaps Sirius' hand away as he moves forward to touch the stout boy's forehead.

Before their charade can go on much longer, the compartment's door opens yet another time—hopefully the last—and in steps Remus. I throw my hands up in the air, "Remmy!"

He gives me a slight smile as I keep up a charade of my own. "Hey Corey."

This gets Peter excited. He jumps up and down pointing right at me, "See? Moony sees her too!"

"Don't point, Peter. It's rude." Remus scowls and pushes Peter's hand down. At this simple sentence, James and Sirius double over in raucous laughter, and I can't help the tiny smile that forces its way onto my lips.

Remus shakes his head as if he can't believe he's friends with a bunch of idiots. Peter sits down beside Sirius with a huff, clearly not seeing the humor in the situation.

"How you been, Pete? Did you get the present I sent you?" I ask, trying to lighten his mood.

It seems to work. His body relaxes and he uncrosses his arms. "Yeah, it was nice. Thank you, Corey."

Silence passes through the five of us for too long—I bet Sirius and James are bursting to say something. I keep my eyes trained on the window. I don't know how long the ride's been so far, but my eyes start to droop. Yawning, I place my head in Remus' lap, which earns a frown from James. Dip jumps down and finds a nice warm place on Sirius' lap, but I'm too tired to care.

"Wake me when we're there," I mumble somewhat incoherently before falling asleep.

.

James gently shakes me awake. This immediately raises questions. One: how did James and Remus switch spots without waking me? I'm such a light sleeper that even a mouse can wake me up. Two: why is James being so gentle? If he's not jumping on my bed to wake me up, then he's hitting me with a pillow.

"Hey sleepy-head," he grins down at me.

I reach up and poke his face, "What are you doing?"

"Waking you up?"

I roll my eyes. "Yes, but I thought I fell asleep on Remus, not you."

At my words, James' face drops. He sighs heavily and runs a hand through his hair before looking back down at me. "Look, I know Remus has a certain alluring quality to him… And I'll admit he's very handsome, and his knowledge on things can be… hot… And his—"

"James!" I cut him off, unable to keep down my laughter. "Are we talking about my crush on Remus, or yours?" The joy I get watching James' face change colors faster than Christmas lights is unmountable.

He starts to blink rapidly as his mouth sputters out nonsense. Either he's malfunctioning because I called him out on his crush for Remus, or he's malfunctioning because I confirmed my crush on Remus. My smile actually starts to hurt.

As if summoned by his name, Remus sticks his head back in the compartment. "Are you ready… What's wrong with James?"

I stand up and move to my trunk, "He's just found out that we both have crushes on you, Remus. What a coincidence."

Remus looks shocked before he catches on. A smirk etches its way onto his face. "Two people at once? Crazy! Two Potters? Even crazier! But you two better get into your robes; we're almost there."


	6. Five

The sun has dipped behind the mountains, being replaced by the moon and stars. All the students filter towards carriages that are hooked to black, skeletal horses. A clump of ice slides down my spine at a glacial pace as one turns its head to look at me. On instinct I back up.

James, who was pulling me along merrily, feels my hesitation and glances back at me. "What's wrong Core? You're not backing out now, are you? Because it's a bit too late for that."

I shake myself out of my stupor and plaster a fake smile on my face and start walking again. I'm sure James didn't buy it, and he'll most likely question me about it the next time we're alone. I follow the rest of the boys to a carriage. I make sure to grab the spot that's furthest away from the horse-like creatures, and with a lurch, they lead us to Hogwarts.

I keep my head down, watching my hands fidget with each other. I feel eyes bore into the side of my face, something I'm already getting used to. But I'm surprised when I look up to see not James staring at me, but Sirius. His gray eyes question me silently, but I look away.

Not long after the carriage stops and we all pile out. Looming in front of me is a large castle with towers and turrets and torch-lit windows. The students flood toward the grand oak doors and into a vast entrance hall. James smirks at me, "You coming?"

And that's when it finally sinks in: I'm here. At Hogwarts! With James! I suppress a child-like squeal as I step foot inside the castle. James squeezes my hand, and I squeeze it back harder. This is all we've dreamed about since we were old enough to go to school. And now it's finally coming true.

The Great Hall still seems to be in the Christmas spirit. Large fir trees stand tall, decorated with twinkling lights. The walls are decorated with mistletoe and holly. Floating in midair are candles, their flames flickering. The ceiling is the spitting image of the night sky.

Four tables laden with golden plates and goblets fill the floor. I know that each of them are for a House. Gryffindors sit at the far left table; James made sure I knew where to sit before coming here. At the far end of the hall is another table, spotting Dumbledore, I suspect that it's for the professors.

I'm knocked out of my daze when someone bumps my shoulder hard. "Ow!"

"I am so sorry about that. My friends are dumbasses." I turn to face a guy. He's taller than me, but who isn't? He smiles kindly down at me, but before I can accept his apology, I'm pushed away from him.

"Stay away from her, Wallace." James all but growls at him.

"James, that's not necessary," I mumble, trying to pull him away. I can feel more eyes land on us. I shiver from the attention and pull on James' sleeve. He allows me to pull him away, and I shoot the guy an apologetic look before the crowd swallows him up.

"What was that about?" I push his shoulder when we sit down beside Sirius and across from Peter and Remus.

"He was a Slytherin," he says simply as if that is a valid excuse.

"And he was apologizing!"

"Because he bumped into you!"

"Accidentally!"

From the staff table, Dumbledore stands up and the whole room goes quiet. "I trust you all had wonderful holidays. There's a few announcements I would like to make. I have talked to the Headmistress of Beauxbatons. She seems to think that some friendly school competition in the form of a Quidditch match would be a good idea. I think so too. In light of this, I'm sad to say that the rest of Hogwarts' Quidditch matches are to be cancelled." There's a school-wide groan at this news.

"Try-outs for a team will be held next Monday after classes. Madam Hooch will pick the best for the job, without bias, I trust. Whoever wins, there will be a celebratory dance afterward. Years four through seven will be held in the evening, while years one through three will have it earlier in the day. Now, let's eat." With a wave of his arms, a variety of foods fill the empty plates. A quick applause and Dumbledore sits down to enjoy the feast.

I pull some chicken and potatoes onto my plate. I try to keep focused on chewing my food and not choking—I never realized how hungry I am—but I catch snippets of conversation about me amidst the chatter. I place my elbow on the table and try to hide my face with my hair.

Not soon enough, the feast is over and everyone is directed to go to their common rooms. I act tired to deflect how uncomfortable I am, hanging onto James as we walk up a marble staircase. He rambles on about Hogwarts, as if I haven't already heard everything from him, promising I'll have the ultimate Hogwarts experience.

Eventually we come upon the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. James helps me through and I land in a cozy room. Some students choose to stay behind, sitting in cushy chairs and couches while others head straight up to their dormitories.

I face James, not ready to leave him yet. New worries pop into my head; worries that I haven't even thought of. What if none of the other fifth year girls like me? What if we don't get along? What if I have nightmares? My nightmares can get pretty bad sometimes. I've never shared a room with other people before. I'd hate for the other girls to think I'm some kind of sleep-screaming freak.

James' arms are around me before I can blink. "Don't worry, everything will be fine." He tightens the hug before pulling back, "Go sleep, okay? I'll see you tomorrow." He then kisses the top of my head before gently pushing me in the direction of the girls' dormitory.

"G'night guys," I wave to Remus, Peter, and Sirius before heading up.

I find the door that says it houses the girls for fifth year. I take a deep breath to steady my nerves before pushing the door open. The room is round like the common room downstairs and empty. Five four-poster beds are spaced apart with scarlet curtains. The walls around four beds are personalized with Muggle and magical bands. Even without the decorations, I'd be able to identify my bed since Dip has been let out of his cat-carrier and is now curled up asleep in the middle of my bed. Sensing that I won't have this room by myself for much longer, I quickly change into my pajamas and crawl into bed.

Just as I close the curtains around my bed, the door opens. "Are you sure, Marlene? The new girl dating Potter? It doesn't make sense." I nearly choke but I keep silent.

"Then you didn't see the way she was hanging on to him. They never let go of each other's hands, and he kissed her goodnight down in the common room!" I'm guessing this girl is Marlene. It takes a lot to not correct her, but I find it more fun to listen to what they have to say about me.

"I wonder why we got a new student?" says a new voice.

"I wonder if it's got anything to do with that announcement of Dumbledore's?"

The silence grows before the first girl talks again. "Why are you all looking at me?"

"Oh c'mon Lily" Marlene bursts, "you can't tell us you had no knowledge of her."

"Yeah, you're a Prefect after all."

"Just because I'm a Prefect, Mary, doesn't mean I get sent letters about some new girl coming to Hogwarts."

More silence.

Then the other three girls squeal, asking for whatever information Lily has on me. "Quiet! You'll wake her… but all I know is that she transferred here from Beauxbatons."

"So it is related about Dumbledore's announcement!" Mary says.

"Well for whatever reason she's here, I forbid you girls to ask her about it." Lily commands.

"Oh you hear that girls? She forbids us." The other girls laugh mockingly.

"Just get to bed," Lily grumbles.

It grows silent and then after a few minutes the lights go out. My body goes stiff in the pitch black and I itch to light my wand. But I stop myself; the last thing I want to do is annoy the girls with it. I'll just have to find a light spell that only I can see. Curling up to Dip, I close my eyes and try to forget the darkness pushing in on me.

I wake up to Dip doing his best to suffocate me. I push him off my face and roll out of bed. Only then do I realize where I am: Hogwarts. More specifically in the fifth year girl's dormitory. A girl with fiery red hair is staring at me. She's sitting on the bed next to mine, obviously waiting for me to wake up.

It takes her a second to register that I'm out of bed. Then she springs off of hers to shake my hand. "Hi, I'm Lily."

"I'm Corey. Nice to meet you."

"I hope you don't mind, but I told the other girls to head down to breakfast. They can be a bit much, and I didn't want them to overwhelm you."

I think back to last night. Waking up to three curious girls is not ideal. "Thanks." The word hangs there awkwardly in the air. I break away and head to my trunk to get changed for the day. I pinch the hat between my fingers and show it to Lily, "Do you guys really wear these?"

Lily gives me a dry smile, "Unfortunately, but you'll get used to it. Do you want to head down to breakfast with me?"

"Uh—" I yank a brush through my hair— "I would love to, but I should probably wait for my brother."

Lily looks shocked, "You have a brother who goes here?"

I finally get all the knots out of my hair and pull the hat on. "James Potter?"

"I'm sorry," she says without skipping a beat, then her hands fly to her mouth as if she can't believe she said that out loud. "I mean, how? Not how. I know how, but I mean…" she stops herself, scratching her forehead, "I am never getting out of this hole, am I?"

I can't help but laugh a little, "It's fine, really. I- I'm adopted." The words are hard to get out, especially to a complete stranger, but it's got to get around somehow. I'd rather people know that I'm James' adopted sister than to think I'm dating him.

Lily doesn't seem to have anything to say. She stares at me, trying to decipher my past without any of the details. "Okay, well if you need anything, don't be hesitant to ask me."

She goes to walk out of the dormitory. I stop her before she can leave, "Hey Lily? Was- was there anything else on that letter Dumbledore sent you?" A blush creeps across her cheeks, embarrassed.

"No, that was all. I swear." She flies out of the room, before I have time to ask her more questions.

That seems to loosen the big ball of nerves in my stomach. I wonder, however, how much Dumbledore does know? I shake the thought away and head downstairs. James is waiting with the rest of the guys. I'm barely off the last stair before he's pulling me into his arms.

"Woah!" I laugh as he spins me around.

"I was afraid it was all a dream."

"If he wakes us up tonight as many times as he did last night, your brother will have one less limb." Sirius warns James before marching toward the portrait hole. During his time spent in the Potter household, I've learned that Sirius is not a morning person and he loves his sleep almost as much as I do.

During breakfast, I'm given my schedule by Professor McGonagall, a strict looking woman until she smiles and congratulates me on becoming a Gryffindor. After that, James cuts breakfast for me short, saying that he's going to show me where my classrooms are. I find it unnecessary, though, since we have all our classes together.

"And this is the astronomy tower. We're not going to walk all the way up there, but you know how stairs work. As you can see, we only have astronomy once a week, but I'm sure—"

"James!" I cut him off because there's another reason he dragged me from eating. "What's wrong?"

His mouth, paused in the middle of saying something, closes. "I should be asking you the same thing."

I watch as he folds his arms. His stance reminds me of Dad when he's trying to get us to tell the truth, except on Dad it works. James just looks like a complete dork. "What do you mean?"

"Last night. You looked like you saw a ghost." He steps towards me, taking my hands in his, "Did you see someone you know?"

I blink as I register his words. "I, uh, I um no. It was just those horses pulling the carriages." A shiver runs through me just thinking about them.

James' face goes from concerned to confused. "What horses? The carriages pull themselves."

I push his shoulder.

"Maybe you're seeing things?"

"Obviously, I do have eyes. How do you think I saw them."

He gives me an unamused look. "I'm serious. I've never seen the carriages being pulled by anything and I've been here for years."

I roll my eyes at him and stomp away. He quickly follows after me, spitting out every excuse he can come up with about what I saw and why I saw it. But I know what I saw, and nothing James says is anywhere close. I add it to the list of things to search for when I head to the library later today.

By the time we make it back to the Great Hall, everyone's already heading to class. Remus, Peter, and Sirius are waiting for us by the bottom of the staircase. I groan because we walked all the way here only to walk back up the stairs to class. Not to mention my stomach is painfully empty.

"Don't worry Core"—James throws an arm around my shoulders— "this way you'll just know the way to Binns' better."

I scoff and push him away. James pushes me back, and I end up stumbling into Sirius. He helps me back to my feet, retracting his hands as soon as I'm up right. I smile and mumble my thanks before scowling over at my brother, who is too busy laughing to see me rush him. His footing is lost as he falls into a group of third years.

.

My first day of classes at Hogwarts goes by smoothly. I was scared that I'd have a hard time adjusting to the professors' curriculum, and that I would have to catch up. Turns out, we were ahead at Beauxbatons. I've already mastered all the spells and potions and charms!

After classes are over, I put to use James' directions he gave me this morning and head for the library. By the sheer number of the books, finding information about the spell and horses will take longer than I thought.

Under the intense glare of the librarian I scuttle into a random section. I spend hours in here, picking up books and flipping through them hoping to get lucky. I thought about asking the librarian for help, but her whole demeanor screams 'help yourself.' And not in a warm and welcoming tone, either.

I'm about to give up finding the horses and light spell when a drawing of a skeletal horse stops me. I gulp as I stare at it. It's just a picture, I tell myself, but as I read the text beside it my breathing shallows. The text beside it is small and not very giving:

Despite being known as bad-omens, Thestrals are very peaceful creatures.  
Only those who have seen death and accepted it, can see them. They like meat.

"Studying already?"

I slam the book closed in fright. The guy from last night stands over me with an easy smile. My heart misses a few beats and I find my breath again. "Uh, hi."

"Hi, I wasn't able to properly introduce myself last night, but I'm Castor."

"Corey,"

"What are you reading?" He peers at the cover of my book, but it's so old and worn that there's no title there anymore.

"Oh, I'm uh, just… Nothing really. Trying to find some light reading," I lie. I'm still freaked out about the horses—Thestrals, they're called. And you can only see them after witnessing a death? That definitely brings up some bad memories.

"Thought I'd get acquainted with the books. I'll probably be in here most of the time, studying for O.W.L.s." I'm not the brightest at Potions or Transfiguration, and end up killing every plant I touch in Herbology; however, I excel with spells and charms. Being ahead of everyone else won't last long.

"Well," Castor says, plucking a random book off the shelf, "if you ever need someone to study with, I'm always available. I'm pretty much a master at studying."

Suddenly, the librarian is pushing her way through us. "Out! Out, the both of you!" She turns us toward the library door, grumbling about how loud we are. The doors slam shut behind us. Castor and I burst into laughter from the irony.

"It's getting late anyway," he says, looking at his watch, "I'll see you tomorrow for studying?"

I hesitate at his offer. Do I want to spend all that time alone with him? Someone I don't even know? How else are you supposed to make friends, I ask myself. I was the same way when I started Beauxbatons. Alone, too scared to make any friends. Anyone who came up to me, I immediately shut them out and they never tried again. Val was the only one who persisted through it all.

"Yeah, it sounds great." I finally answer before we part ways.

Finding the Gryffindor common room proves to be more difficult than it should be. Who thought moving staircases was a good idea? I get turned around three different times, going right back to where I started because of them.

When I finally do find the common room, I have to stand outside and have a conversation about wines with the Fat Lady because I don't know the password. Luckily for me, Lily comes to the rescue.

"Corey?"

I stand up at her voice. "Lily! Thank Merlin. I don't know the password. Please tell me you know it because my back hurts and I'm exhausted."

She giggles at me, "Of course I do." She turns toward the Fat Lady, and not giving her a chance to say anything, mumbles, "Mistletoe." The portrait swings open, revealing the cozy common room.

I'm barely through the portrait before being grabbed. "Where the hell have you been?" James pushes my face into his shoulder so I'm unable to answer. I beat on his back until he lets me go.

"What the hell, James?"

"What the hell me? What the hell you, Core? I've been looking for you everywhere! It's almost curfew."

My eyes shift around us, now aware of our audience. Remus and Sirius are sitting in front of the fire, politely staying out of it, although I'm sure they can still hear us. I can't say the same for the other Gryffindors who are blatantly staring at us. "James can we not do this right now?" I ask under my breath, but he's not being totally forgiving right now.

"No, we can do this now. Answer my question: where the hell were you?"

My anger is quick to boil over. I poke his chest, "First of all, you are not my father. I am old enough to not need a babysitter, and go wherever the hell I want to. Second of all, if you actually did search for me, then you'd have seen me out in front of the portrait. Now, if you're done being a total jerk, I'm going to bed."

I march off, trying my best to block out the snickers from the other students. Embarrassment pricks my cheeks and runs down the rest of my body. I'm halfway up the girls' staircase when I hear a collective shout from the common room. The stairs smooth out from under me and my face hits the floor hard as I start to slide down.

My feet hit something soft. I hear James yowl in pain. For some reason the staircase turned into a slide. Groaning, I turn over and remove my feet from James' face. Something hot pours down my face: blood.

"Oh shit. Core, I'm so sorry." James crawls over to me, bunching up his sleeve to stop my nose bleed.

I take my own sleeve and wipe the dirt from my shoe off his face. "I'm sorry too."

We stare at each other before doubling over in laughter.


	7. Six

**So sorry for the delay guys, but I really struggled with writing this chapter.**

* * *

One week. That's how long it took for the Gryffindor house—plus the rest of Hogwarts once news got around—to get over mine and James' fight. Everybody had their fun with it, making fun of me. James didn't like this fact, but I reminded him that it was his fault in the first place. If he hadn't overreacted then this never would have happened.

However, a Hogsmeade trip came along and cut the making fun of me short. Apparently, this isn't just a normal trip. Since almost every girl complained about not having a dress for the dance at the end of the year, Dumbledore issued an 'emergency' trip to the village. Some of the girls have already had their parents owl dresses to them.

"I can't believe I won't be with you on your first Hogsmeade trip," James says as he walks me to the front of the castle. It's the weekend before Madam Hooch will choose who will play in the Hogwarts Quidditch team, and James and most of the Quidditch players are staying behind to practice.

I place a hand on his shoulder, "Don't worry James. Next time we both go, I'll try to make my reactions as genuine as possible."

He slaps a hand over his heart, "You're the best sister ever." He pulls me into a hug, smashing me into his chest.

"She's going to be crushed if you don't let go of her." I hear Sirius say, but James gives me one more impossible squeeze before letting go. It's then that I realize that he's not just sad about missing out on my first Hogsmeade trip; he's terrified of something happening to me. I can't say he's the only one.

It would be nice to have James there with me, even if I'll have Remus and Peter. I know nothing will happen to me, but that doesn't stop scenario after scenario playing through my head, only heightening my anxiety.

"Just stay with Remus and Peter, okay? They'll look after you," James says under his breath to me.

"Okay, but I do have other friends to hang out with." On instinct, my eyes scan the crowded Entrance Hall for Castor. Over the course of my first week, I've gotten closer to Castor than I would've thought. He quickly made his way onto my list of friends with his easy-going personality and how well he understands everything.

I'm staying on the cautious side, keeping my trust on a short leash as I get to know more about Castor. James is less than thrilled about my friendship with the Slytherin; he's always trying to convince me that Castor is bad. But unlike my brother, I'm not blinded by House rivalries.

"C'mon Core, we've talked about this. You don't actually want a friendship with that snake. You're only doing it to get back at me."

I roll my eyes and cross my arms. I never should have said anything. "You're unbelievable."

"No, what's unbelievable is that you'd rather be friends with a Slytherin than be friends with Sirius. I can't believe you like a snake more than you do Sirius."

"Don't be ridiculous James. You're just angry that I'm making friends you don't like."

He straightens up, "Seems like we have that in common."

I stare at him in disbelief. "Whatever," I grab Remus' and Peter's hands and march out of the castle. "Why is it so hard for him to understand that Slytherins can be nice? I bet he's never even took the time to civilly talk to a Slytherin, has he?"

"He's annoyed," Remus starts, "he thinks that you're being reckless."

I throw my arms up in exasperation, "Reckless how?"

"Some Slyterins are dangerous," Peter speaks up, pulling his scarf away from his lips for a moment. "They practice the dark arts so when they leave Hogwarts, they can become followers of You-Know-Who."

I've tried to keep the horrors of the impending war out of my mind. Some wizard turned evil is on the rise and he's collecting more and more followers everyday. He doesn't care about the laws, and no one has been able to stop him. The Daily Prophet announces at least one death a week.

It makes me wonder about my past and who could be involved. And if they are, then how much longer will it take before they find me? A shiver runs through me from the unsettling feeling of eyes boring into the back of my head. I rub my neck, the skin is slightly raised from a scar, and I glance behind me.

I don't expect to find anyone staring at me. I get this feeling all the time and no one is ever there. But this time I find Severus Snape glaring at me with his cold, dark eyes. He's walking with Lily, who is talking animatedly about something. Snape and I haven't even said one word to each other, but he seems to hate me. I know about the feud between him and James and his friends, the Marauders as they like to call themselves. I don't understand the hatred between them, but then again, they're boys. Who can understand them.

"But you don't really expect it to be only Slytherins, do you?" I stuff my hands in my pockets as the bitter wind picks up. "Anyone can go evil. It's not just about what Hogwarts house you're in. There's a whole world out there with bad people who haven't even gone to Hogwarts."

"Yeah, but for now, you're surrounded by the evil in Hogwarts," Remus says. "And you know how James is…"

"Annoying? Irrational? Every other synonym I can't think of?" Remus snorts a little.

"I was going to say protective, but those work too. You have to understand that he's worried, and he's going to be worried until… forever. He's going to calm down eventually, you just have to give him time."

He's right, I know, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.

We walk in silence for a while and soon enough the village of Hogsmeade comes into view. Students flood towards a pub called the Three Broomsticks, and we follow the mass. We find a small table in the back of the room, trying not to spill any of our Butterbeer.

With the warmth and friendly atmosphere, I can tell why everyone flocks here. It's nice after the walk in the cold, especially sipping Butterbeer. Laughter rings out through the chatter. The door opens and I spot Castor walk in with a few of his friends. They shake the snow off themselves before moving to the bar.

"James does have a point," Peter says, smacking his lips, "I don't understand why you would rather be friends with a Slytherin than Sirius."

I avert my eyes down to my half-empty mug of Butterbeer. I was hoping they wouldn't bring this up. It's true I haven't warmed up to Sirius yet, and it's frustrating because I don't know why. Can't me not liking him be reason enough? I've tried to keep the problem in the back of my head, stay busy by studying.

"You want the truth?" I level my gaze to them. "I don't know why I don't like Sirius, okay? I want to like him, but it's hard to, okay?"

Remus sits back, eyes on the table, as he mulls it over. "Have you ever thought about how similar your old family is like Sirius'? In the sense that they're both into the dark arts? And horrible people all together? Maybe you're jealous, afraid that James will replace you."

I slump down in my seat, "You think that's it?"

My tone is unbelieving, but even as I say it, I know that's what it is. It clicks into my brain like the perfect puzzle piece. I knew that was the reason in the back of my head, but my stubborn subconscious kept it hidden. How can I not be jealous of their relationship? All it feels like James and I have done since being here is argue, while he's laughing and talking secretly with Sirius. Not to mention they all have those nicknames for each other, and years of inside jokes.

Then guilt settles in. I shouldn't feel this way. Sirius has been nothing but nice to me since he's met me. I, however, have not been the friendliest or welcoming. Their bond is something to be scared of… but that shouldn't affect the way I treat Sirius…

.

After finishing our drinks, we decide to brave the cold. Honeydukes is our first stop. The only word I can find to describe the candy store is hectic. It's full of Hogwarts students, pushing each other so they can get to their preferred candy. We don't stay here for long, just enough so Remus can stock up on his chocolate.

Remus pauses in front of a store that has an influx of girls. Dresses of different sizes and colors fill the store. "You wanna go look?"

I glance into the windows again and shake my head, "I wasn't really planning on going to the dance." I've never been to any kind of dance in my life, but the idea just doesn't appeal to me.

"Okay, then do you just want to go back to Hogwarts?"

"Yes please," I say, "it's free—" A hand grabs my arm. I jump and pull away, but sigh in relief when I see it's only Lily.

"I am so glad I found you! The girls are being crazy, and I need an opinion. Will you help me?"

I'm shocked because despite sharing a room together, we've had little interaction. But here she is, asking for my opinion on a dress. "Uh, sure?"

A smile breaks her face in two, "Great!" She grabs my hand and whisks me away into the store.

"We'll be at the Three Broomsticks!" Remus calls after me before the doors separate us.

The store is more hectic on the inside than it looks on the outside. It's like the whole of Hogwarts female population is in here, tossing dresses back and forth, holding up a rainbow of dress colors to themselves, asking which color goes best with their eyes.

I avoid as many hands reaching out as I can as Lily drags me back into a corner. Marlene, Mary, and Dorcas are back here, dresses draped over their shoulders as they dance around and occasionally break into laughter.

"Now you see why I need help?" Lily sighs and grabs two dresses from a chair. One's a sequined yellow dress and the other is a silky royal blue. She holds them up to her chest, switching them out. "Blue? Or yellow?"

"I say the blue. It really compliments your hair."

"Really?" She spins on her heal to look at herself in the mirror.

"I could've told you that," the mirror says.

"It's decided then," she turns back around, the blue dress flaring around her legs, "I'll buy the blue."

"What about you, Corey?" Mary asks, brushing her dirty blonde hair out of her eyes. "Have you found a dress yet?"

"Yeah, you must be excited for the dance. You'll get to see all of your Beauxbatons friends." Dorcas wipes sweat off her dark skin, because despite the frigid temperatures outside, the store is a thousand degrees hotter from all the bodies in here.

My Beauxbaton friends… meaning Val, but I haven't talked to her since my last day there. I should have sent her an apology letter along time ago, but my mind was busy with the whole Sirius situation. If we don't make up, do I really want to face her at the dance?

"Can you introduce me to any cute guys?" Marlene pushes herself through the other girls, twirling her hair.

"Uh," my eyes dart around for an answer. Saying I don't even want to go would raise too many questions I don't want to answer. So, I escape. "I should go."

I duck under an outstretched arm and make my way out of the store to meet back up with Remus and Peter so we head back to the castle. I split off from the guys and head for the Owlery. I try to work out what all I'm going to say to Val. There's too much to put into a letter, and I know no matter what I say, she's still going to be mad. That's just how Val is. She's too stubborn for her own good.

So instead of trying to explain myself, I decide to write down only two words: I'm sorry. It's enough to get her to write back at me, however mad that letter will be. I watch the owl fly off until I can't see it anymore. Sighing, I head back to the common room, only I've fallen victim of the moving staircases again.

Then I see a dark figure round the corner. Their head is down, eating something but I recognize who it is. "Sirius!" His head pops up and he looks around before he realizes it was, in fact, me who yelled for him.

"Back from Hogsmeade already?" he asks, walking closer to me. From this distance, I can tell that he has a pumpkin pasty.

"Yeah, too cold to enjoy it. How was Quidditch practice?" We start walking in what I hope is the direction of the Gryffindor common room.

"Crowded. And cold, but you don't really notice it because of all the adrenaline." We walk in silence for awhile. I'm picking my brain for how to start my apology to Sirius, because how can I just come right out and say that I'm jealous and afraid of his and James' friendship? That's embarrassing.

"Look," Sirius starts, "I want you to know that I don't agree with what James said this morning. Although, I don't understand why you'd want to be friends with a snake… I don't think you're doing it to get back at James for not liking me."

My head snaps up to him, glad that he brought it up first but also surprised he brought it up at all. "I, uh I actually wanted to apologize for that. I-I mean, for the way I've been acting towards you. It's not fair that I never gave you a chance, but honestly, I didn't even know my own emotions. Well, I did but I didn't, you know what I mean?

"And I know you don't have any reason to believe this, but I really am a nice person. I try to be at least. I'll understand if you don't, but I was wondering if we could just start over?" I stop walking and so does Sirius.

He stares at me, gray eyes connecting with mine until it's almost uncomfortable. I'm afraid he's going to say no and then push me down the stairs just for suggesting a new start between us, but then he smiles. "Hi, I'm Sirius."

He holds out his hand for me to shake. I stare at it just like stared at me, then I take it. "Hi, I'm Corey Potter."

"Interesting last name. Do you have a brother?"

"Indeed I do. Do you know him?"

"Unfortunately. Did you know he snores in his sleep?" Sirius barely gets this out without laughing.

"He denies it like his life depends on it, but I can hear him across the hall."

Laughing with Sirius feels better than being jealous of him.


	8. Seven

"I don't like you two together." James pouts as we head to DADA.

"C'mon Prongs, it's not permanent!" Sirius bites his knuckles in order to keep back his laughter, but it doesn't work and when he loses it, I lose it. We double over and end up on the floor, unable to breathe.

"This isn't funny!" James screams, although I can sense a hint of a smile in his voice.

I wipe away a tear of mirth and look up at him. His bright green hair clashes horribly with his even brighter orange eyebrows. To add insult to injury, there's a sad excuse of a drawn-on mustache on his face; one side is very curly while the other side hangs limp.

James turns to Remus, "Moony, do something!"

Remus tips his head to the side, trying and failing to hide a smile, "I can't do that James. It'll just make the spell last longer."

"Be lucky we ran out of time to catch you snoring." I say, pushing myself up.

"I don't snore." He crosses his arms and stomps off.

I dare a glance at Sirius. He's still on the floor and looks ready to burst again. I hold out my hand and help him up. "C'mon, we're going to be late."

It's only been a few days since Sirius and I 'started over.' I have to say, it's a nice feeling to be his friend. It's easy to be myself around him, and now I know why James likes him so much. I've thought about telling Sirius about my past, but whenever I go to do so, I find myself hesitating. It's always a hard subject to bring up, and our friendship is still so new.

I quickly learned that Professor Moden, the DADA professor, is a bit over the top. Today is no different as I step into the classroom. All the tables and chairs have been pushed against the walls. Everyone files into the back of the room all looking a bit wary. I can't blame them.

"The time has come!" A door slams open into the wall, hard enough to knock a few chips off and Professor Moden steps in the room. He's a tiny man with crazy hair as though he spins his finger in it for hours at a time. His robes are too big for him so he's always tripping over the hem, but that doesn't change the fact that he's great with spells.

"What? He's finally going to brush his hair?" Marlene whispers behind me.

"Everyone partner up!"

There's a scramble for everyone to pick partners. I end up with Lily. She gives me a huge smile as Moden moves us so we're on opposite sides of the room from our partners. He strides up and down the wide aisle we make.

"Love the new look, James," Moden comments as he passes my brother. The class laughs and to hide his embarrassment, James just blows kisses to everyone while messing up his bright hair. "As you know, death and doom is on our doorstep. I have taken it upon myself, as it is my job, to prepare you for an attack.

"This is how it will work: it'll be one-on-one. You'll try to unarm the person you're dueling. You're not to use any spells, charms, hexes, et cetera that will render him or her helpless or unable to fight back. That goes for harming and maiming them, as well. That's not what this is about. When you have unarmed your partner, you will move on to the next person until there is only two of you left. Winner gets no homework from me for a week. Ready? Go!"

Lily hits me with the first spell, but it shoots past my shoulder. I hit her back with a knockback. She stumbles back, but her wand stays firmly in her hand. Lily sends a jelly-legs curse at me, but I quickly put up a shield.

"Expelliarmus!" Lily's wand flies cleanly out of her hand and into mine. She looks dejected for not winning, but takes her wand and tells me good luck before moving back with the others who didn't win their fights.

After Lily, I move on to fight Mary and Marlene. Both of these fights only last a few spells. I don't really remember much, to be honest. The only time my focus is broken is when James curses out loud. I look over and see Sirius laughing while James is charging at him with antlers. I look back at my opponent quick enough to stop the oncoming spell.

"Are we the last two?" Sirius asks as I hand Marlene back her wand.

I glance around. We're the only two left; the others are lined up against the back wall. I give a tiny wave to James, whose antlers are gone, but his hair is as green as ever. "I guess so." I say.

Sirius gives me the tiniest smirk, but it's filled with arrogance. "I'll go easy on you."

"Funny, I was going to say the same thing to you." I gently slap his face before going to my side of the room.

I send my first spell towards him, hoping to get him out quick.

"Flippendo!" He says, ignoring James' distracting cheering.

I block it. A stream of yellow flies out of my wand and a desk next to him turns into a giant duck. I jump back. "You were going to turn me into a duck?" he yells, turning to what could've been his fate.

"It was the first spell that came to my mind." I call back.

Then we're back at it again. I fall into a trance; my spells get faster, and I notice that I'm doing it all nonverbally. The same thing happened when Francis cornered me. Ugh, Francis. His face flashes through my mind, paving the way for others: Volan, Phoebe, Nash.

"Expelliarmus!" My voice is so powerful that Sirius flies backward into the wall. His wand is torn from his hand and lands behind me. My eyes wide, I run over to him. "Are you okay?" My hands fumble around, trying to get to the back of his head to see if he's bleeding.

He grabs my hands and gives me a dazed smile. "The only thing hurt is my pride."

"Well done!" Professor Moden congratulates, clapping me on the back. "The way you perfectly executed those spells nonverbally? Wonderful! Twenty points for Gryffindor!" He waves his hand and turns toward the rest of the class.

"In light of Miss Potter's performance, I want an essay written on how nonverbal spells are more effective than verbal. No less than a foot, please. You may go now. Mr. Black, head down to the hospital wing."

* * *

 _"Please Mother, it hurts." My voice comes out dry and broken from screaming. My limbs hang limp as I float in the air. Down below, my eyes search for a friendly face, but I'm only met with the familiar cold and sallow face of Mother._

 _"That's what I love to hear: begging. It's music to my ears." Red light bolts out of her wand and the vast room is filled with my screams. I wriggle and writhe in pain. My body feels as though hot needles are pricking my skin over and over. I plead for her to stop, but her only response is laughter._

 _Just when I thought it would never stop, a voice breaks through the curse and screams. "Stop!"_

 _Gravity takes hold and I fall to the floor with a sickening crunch. I roll off my shoulder and cradle it, whimpering in agonizing pain. My breathing becomes labored but I manage to focus on the voice. I gasp. "James?" It's barely audible but his eyes flicker to me._

 _He rushes toward me. Green light lights up the room. James pauses for a second before he drops to the floor, still with eyes open wide with surprise. "No! James, look at me!" I crawl toward him as laughter rings out behind me._

 _"You'll never be able to escape me, Cordelia. I will find you, and I will kill those who you love. Just like you killed who I loved. Now wake up!"_

I sit up in my bed, gasping for air. Dip meows as Lily's face looks down on me with concern. "Are you okay? You were screaming in your sleep."

I push her off me, mumbling incoherently, telling her that I'm fine. Even though I'm clearly not as I stumble blindly through the room, sobbing my eyes out. James isn't dead, I tell myself. His face haunts my mind with his blank eyes. It's not real. It's not real. It's not real.

I find my way down to the common room, and I fall to my knees in front of the fireplace. Her words echo in my mind and I pull at my hair, wanting it out. I haven't heard that voice in so long I had almost forgotten what it sounded like. But I'm not that lucky. I'll never be able to get rid of it; it's embedded in my brain permanently, just as my scars are permanent.

Hands grab me. I yank back only to see it's Sirius. "Hey, hey, it's just me. It's just me," he reassures, pulling back his hands.

"Sorry, sorry," I croak, discreetly wiping my face and turning to the fire. The heat dries my face. I pull my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around them. Out of the corner of my eye, I watch Sirius sit beside me. He's been in the hospital wing since DADA and I guess he just now got released. Or left on his own terms.

"So, what happened?"

I take in a shaky breath. "Nightmare."

"That bad?" he asks. I can only nod because as a fresh wave of tears hit me. I bury my face in my knees.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I shake my head, but I find myself talking anyway. "It's just not fair, you know? It's not fair that after all these years, after I got away she is still in my head. She knows how to get to me, torturing me every time I close my damn eyes.

"Can she just let me rest? Leave me alone? She's done enough damage that's going to last for the rest of my life! It's not fair. It's not fair…" I break down again, crying into my hands.

Sirius must be confused; he has no clue who I'm talking about. I keep waiting for him to leave. He doesn't seem like the type to comfort a crying girl. I don't know why I even said that. And to him no less. Sure we've become friends, but we're not that close for me to just spill everything to him.

"Do you want me to go grab James? I'm sure you'd feel better with him."

"No." I pick up my head and wipe my face. I love James, but he doesn't do too well when it comes to my past. He gets angry and sad when he thinks about it. "But you don't have to sit here with me. I'll be fine." I tell him.

"Hey maybe I like sitting balled up in front of the fire. You don't know me." He knocks his shoulder into mine, giving me a soft smile.

So we just sit there, watching the flames dance. When they dim, Sirius pokes at the logs and the fire starts back up again. I want to tell him about it all. By the time all my courage is gathered, I glance beside me and he's laying on the floor asleep. Silently, I pull a quilt off one of the cushy chairs and drape it over him. I grab my own quilt and lay down in front of the fire, reveling in the warmed floor.

.

"Corey… Wake up, Core."

I keep my eyes close, not wanting to lose the sweet feeling of sleep. But the whispering and shaking doesn't stop. "You need to wake up, Corey."

… Is that Sirius? What is Sirius doing in my bed? And why is my bed so hard? Then everything comes rushing back. That horrible nightmare; James' face; her voice. And then Sirius sort of comforting me. He fell asleep and then I followed after.

I crack open an eye. The early morning sun blinds me, but when my eyes focus, I'm met with a highly awkward scene. I'm cuddled up against Sirius. His arm is under my head, while my hands have a firm grip on the front of his shirt.

"Oh, sorry," I mumble and let go of his shirt, smoothing it out but the wrinkles are resilient. I don't know how we even got into this position. We weren't even that close when we fell asleep last night.

"Don't worry about it. I have other shirts," Sirius smirks as he sits up. He runs a hand through his messy hair, trying to flatten it. "Good thing we woke up before everybody else."

My eyes widen. I can't imagine how James would react if he found us! His best friend and sister. I stand up and make myself busy by folding the quilts and placing them back on the chair. A warm little stone finds its way into my stomach.

I glance back at Sirius, who is still sitting in the floor looking tired. "Thank you for staying with me last night. You didn't have to."

"I wanted to. And hey, if you need someone to talk to, I'm a horrible listener, but I'll be here if you ever need to talk."

"Thanks. That means a lot."

The girls are still asleep when I go up to change, thankfully. I remember Lily's concerned face, and I wonder if I woke up the other girls with my screaming. That's one conversation I'm not ready to have.

From my bed, Dip meows accusingly at me. I guess he knows what happened last night. Good thing animals can't speak. I pat him on the head and promise to sneak him some chicken from lunch later before heading down to the Great Hall.

"Good morning, Corey." I look up to see Castor and a couple of his friends coming up from the dungeons. Castor has introduced me to a couple of his friends and they all seem nice. Definitely not the evil-doers James believes Slytherins are.

"I'll meet you guys in there." Castor breaks away from his friends, who all laugh and taunt him. His face goes completely red but when he gets to me he doesn't explain what just happened.

"Hey, it feels like forever since I last saw you," he says stopping in front of me.

I wince. "I know, and I'm sorry." Ever since Sirius and I have become friends, I've sort of stopped studying with Castor. Usually, we would have study sessions every night, but that was—mostly—an excuse so I didn't have to be around Sirius. Now that I actually like being around him, I haven't seen Castor as much as I would.

"How about we meet in the library after classes? We're having a test on Vanishing spelling in Transfiguration, and I could really use some help."

"Vanishing spells? I'm a master at those." Castor is in his sixth year, so he's the best study partner I could have right now.

"Great, I'll see you later then." I send him a smile before walking into the Great Hall. The room quickly fills up and it only makes me more thankful that Sirius woke up when he did. Otherwise, it wouldn't be a good look on either of us.

My mind is pulled in two different directions when James and the guys walk in. On one hand, I'm plagued by images from my nightmare last night. The worst part about my nightmares is not that it's a recreation of what happened in the past, but that it always sticks someone I love in there, and something bad always happens.

On the other hand, I find myself blushing when I see Sirius. I've never been that close to a boy before. Well, not a boy who hasn't forced himself upon me like Francis did. I'd be lying is I said I didn't mind it. Sirius was warm and I didn't mind his close proximity. I'm not usually a toucher.

I'm relieved to see the owls swoop in to deliver letters. I've been on the lookout ever since I sent Val my apology. So far, there's been no response, but that doesn't seem like the case today as a barn owl lands in front of me, and accidentally steps in James' plate of food.

I untie the letter from the owl's leg and open it. However, the message is more confusing than my mixed emotions. There's only a frowny face. Definitely Val's drawing, but what does it mean? That she's sad I'm not there anymore? Is she saying that it's too bad I'm sorry, but she doesn't accept it? Is she sorry as well?

Why does my best friend have to be cryptic?

The day passes quickly and I find myself in my least favorite class: divination. Don't get me wrong, the concept is very interesting, but I'm the last person who wants to know my future. Professor Clarotter, however, seems to like it a lot less than I do. All she has us do is read tea leaves, but today is different.

"Class, I want you all to start writing down your dreams!" She catches us before class lets out, but it does the trick.

I walk out of the classroom in a daze. I can't write down my dreams! It's bad enough that I have to go through them while sleeping, I can't be writing that stuff down. It's horrible, and personal. Very personal.

I fall behind the rest of the group as I worry over this problem. I could always just make up dreams… but I'm not very creative. Or I could just not do it. Clarotter barely checks on us when we're reading tea leaves—most students don't even do it anymore—so she may not even read our dream journals.

"You okay?" Sirius asks.

I nod my head, "Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Here." He digs into his pocket and pulls out a chocolate frog. "I always keep chocolate on me in case Remus needs it, but you look like you could use it."

I smile at Sirius and take the chocolate. "Thank you." I take a bite, but I don't know if the warmth that spreads through my body is from the chocolate itself, or from Sirius' gesture.


End file.
